The Ultimate Cliche
by whateverworks
Summary: The Cliches of Dramione Fanfiction..Countdown:Five To The Ultimate Cliche..No exceptions..Comes With The Verdict Part...Not Telling You What It Is Until You Read The Story..


The Ultimate Cliché

The Ultimate Cliché

Countdown: From Five To The ULTIMATE Cliché..

Hello Reader!! I hope you laugh your head off with this one…

Comes with the verdict part where I decide if I had been making or reading stories that are clichéd. Let's all admit it, loud and clear, we love making clichés and reading them.

Disclaimer: The earth is flat. The pigs are flying. And I am the proud owner of The Harry Potter Series.

5. Making Hermione suddenly drop-dead gorgeous during the summer and all the boys fall at her feet and worship the ground she walks on.(complete with OMG)

Verdict: Guilty..uhmm..plays with fingers curses I admit it…I love reading this kind of stories…

"_I need to show them that I could be beautiful, I'm tired of this life I lead," Hermione decided._

_She had a complete makeover. She suddenly had the longest legs and the biggest breasts known to womankind. Her hair was as straight as a post and had the loveliest shade of brown. She had the face of a goddess and knows how to put makeup._

"_Just wait and I'll kill you, evil author, for messing with me," she glared complete with the murderous aura._

Ooops…let's try that again..

"_Just wait when they see me tomorrow, they'll shriek and everyone will have their jaws dropped," she mutters, practically to no one._

_The next morning, Ginny shouted Oh My Gawd for the whole Platform 3 and ¼'s to hear and all the boys had their jaws dropped._

4. Making Draco Malfoy the ultimate John Tucker of Hogwarts. Figuratively and Literally. (complete with OMG)

Verdict: Guilty…well..uhmm..at least I did not do it literally…though I love reading those stories…Draco is still hot and all...he's just a snob and mean and touchy…a little personality change wouldn't hurt, right?

Nod your head or die!!

"_Oh come on now girls, I know you're all practically jealous, after all, I'm dating Draco Malfoy," Pansy Parkinson said with an arrogant flair._

"_Oh no, you're not. I'm dating Drakie, you psycho bitch," Hannah Abbott glared dangerously._

"_Oh My God, I'm totally dating him and the two of you are just Dracoholic sluts," Lavender Brown shouted._

"_Girls, stop it. You know you three are being played at by that bastard," Hermione stated as- a- matter-of- factly._

_Then you, of all people, know what happens next…_

3. Hermione making the biggest mistake of her life by dating Ron, only to find being cheated and ran to Draco Malfoy(who secretly likes Hermione) for comfort.

Verdict: No…Never in a billion years…It's just weird and sorry for all the Ron lovers out there, but Ron just sucks ass for me. I don't like Draco being the rebound or good comfort guy.

"_Oh Draco, I found Ron shagging some girl from Hufflepuff and I'm absolutely depressed but I think you're really handsome and I would want to snog you silly," Hermione said, sobbing uncontrollably in Draco's chest._

"_Me too, Hermione. I really liked you since third year but I kept my love unrequited because it's so much more sad and angsty that way, so everyone would take pity on me, not you, you evil witch," Draco answered._

"_Go on with the plot you idiot. You are supposed to say I have always loved you with all my heart and I have wanted to shag you since forever," Hermione said, glaring._

"_Oh..okay, I have always loved you with all my heart and blond hair-_

_Hermione was murderous._

"_What?"_

"_Get the blond hair part...It's supposed to be romantic."_

"_But I love my hair."_

_Hermione was ready to hex him into the next century._

"_Hermione, my darling, my everything, I have always loved you and I have wanted to shag you since forever."_

_And off they went to the nearest broom closet and find lalaland full of babies._

2. The headboy/headgirl kind of story. They share a dorm and an adjoining bathroom.

Verdict: Guilty…I absolutely adore this kind of stories.

"_Oh Em Gee, I'm so gonna find him half-naked and all hot and yummy," Hermione imagined._

"_Go away..Evil thoughts…Get a life."_

"_You know you like him."_

"_Who are you?"_

"_I'm you. You're me."_

"_Fuck off, conscience."_

"_You're no fun at all."_

_Then Hermione finds out Draco also likes her and they married, had a million kids and lived happily ever after._

1. The Ultimate Cliche is: Stories About Cliched Stories!!Yippee!!rolls eyes Oh, the irony.

Verdict: Nuh-uh..I am so not guilty…Some twisted author must have made this story and controlled me(with amazing magical powers) into doing this so I could be embarrassed.

I hate you!! Damn twisted author you!! Get a life, get fucked, die and then go to hell!!

Please review…If you have time..please check out my account..

**Hugs 'n Hisses,**

**Apocalypse Wrath**


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